By Judy Fortin
CNN Medical Correspondent

My husband and I will celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary this year. We’re also marking two decades of spending Valentine’s Day together.

I’ll never forget the first time February 14 came around during our relationship. I didn’t even receive a card. My husband claimed it was a greeting card holiday and he didn’t want a company telling him when to express his feelings. He didn’t make that mistake again. I received a bouquet of flowers the next day.

As our first anniversary approached, I searched for the perfect gift. My husband gave me a fire extinguisher, saying he always wanted me to be safe. Fortunately, we’ve never had to use the device and his gift selections have improved significantly.

I can’t help laughing when I think back on some of our early days as a couple. It is our ability to still laugh together that helps us get through the ups and downs of marriage. Together we’re raising two beautiful children, we’re nurturing our careers and periodically, we’re patching up our old house.

I asked Emory University Psychiatrist Dr. Charles Raison about the health benefits of a long, steady relationship. He told me that some studies reveal that married people are happier than single people.

Depending on the quality of the relationship, Raison said “marriages can both lower and raise blood pressure and extend life and shorten it.”

In other words, a good relationship with a steady partner can be good for your health. It’s reassuring to confirm what I’ve already learned during the past two decades. There is nothing better than growing old with someone you love, trust and admire. We are partners, companions and even Valentines.

How has your loving relationship positively affected your health? Do you find that the good times help you to better navigate the difficult times? We’d love to hear your thoughts.

Editor's Note: Medical news is a popular but sensitive subject rooted in science. We receive many comments on this blog each day; not all are posted. Our hope is that much will be learned from the sharing of useful information and personal experiences based on the medical and health topics of the blog. We encourage you to focus your comments on those medical and health topics and we appreciate your input. Thank you for your participation.

By Val Willingham

Medical Producer

I've been reading a lot about sex lately. Not the stuff with nothing-to-the-imagination pictures or racy prose.  I'm talking health studies on sex. It's bad enough that we are bombarded 24/7 with details of Lindsay Lohan's exploits or Madonna's great sex life, but now serious medical journals are taking up the once-taboo topic.

But scientists say sex shouldn't be taboo.  Knowing how people conduct their sex lives is important, they say. It helps us understand that we're probably not so different from the rest of the world.  Just recently an article in a prestigious journal announced that the optimal amount of time for sexual intercourse was three to 13 minutes. (Read more about the study)  Seems therapists looked at 1,500 couples in 2005 and found the median duration was 7.3 minutes.  Women in the study were actually armed with stopwatches.  How romantic.

"There are so many myths in our culture of what other people are doing sexually," says Marianne Brandon, a clinical psychologist and director of Wellminds Wellbodies in Annapolis, Maryland. "Most people's sex lives are not as exciting as other people think they are."

Therapists I've talked to say your sex life is like your fingerprint.  No two are the same.  What works for some doesn't work for others. We spend so much time worrying about measuring up to Heidi Klum or Matthew McConaughey that we miss the moment. Analyzing sex and putting it under a microscope, to me, just takes the fun and passion out of it.

I realize sex studies will continue.  But wouldn't it be nice if the money they put into this kind of research could go to finding the cure for breast, prostate or cervical cancer?    Who cares if you go three minutes or three hours? If you wake up smiling, that's all that counts.  Put the stopwatches away, and get down to some real research.

What do you think? 

Editor's Note: Medical news is a popular but sensitive subject rooted in science. We receive many comments on this blog each day; not all are posted. Our hope is that much will be learned from the sharing of useful information and personal experiences based on the medical and health topics of the blog. We encourage you to focus your comments on those medical and health topics and we appreciate your input. Thank you for your participation.